| news. |
[13 Jun 2006|01:57pm] |
I got a job. (nickoletti's...CLICHE')
I shaved my head. (Skinhead status)
I met all of alkaline trio and watched their soundcheck. (Jaked on Green Beers, Bloodied Up, and Since You Been Gone.)
(Dan had a beard and was wearing a Chicago cubs hate from the 20's. he was really short and had an even bigger lisp than i thought.)
(Matt was really friendly and when we mentioned we were from the desert, he thought Victorville... not knowing their was anything past that but bushes and shit.)
(Derek was realllly nice, but Ive already met him before...)
(They all signed my school ID.)
Lifelong goal #2... CHECK.
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| re-evaluation, re-evaluation, re-evaluation. |
[08 May 2006|11:23pm] |
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mood |
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confused |
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music |
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John Mayer. |
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So I decided Im lost again. The only reason I am posting in this is for fear of losing it if I dont. Im also patiently awaiting the completion of my laundry.
I have absolutly no clue where my head has been for the last like.. month.
I decided I need to take a step back and look at all of the choices I have been making. Decide whats important and not so important.
Being at the crucial age of the teens; life is so crazy.
High School is sooo intense and wow... it just hurts your head.
I came to the comclusion a long time ago that 90% of students are fake. It really makes me sick... and Im pretty much over it.
I realized that Im going to be pretty much screwed next year when Im a senior.
Wayyy more than half of my close friends are graduating this year, and Im not close to very many juniors at all anymore.
Its kind of sad really, and I have a feeling next year is going to be pretty interesting.
sooo prom is in less than two weeks.... awwwwweesome. im actually reallllllly excited. The whole planning part has never been a favorite of mine, but i am soooo excited to be going with such an awesome person!
Im actually not nervous about how it will turn out whatsoever.
i love it.
love love love .
Im also really trying to get a job this summer.
So far it kind of looks like Ill be working at the B&g club.. but i wont know for sure until the end of the week.
Im kinda nervous, I really need it.
anyways,
Im tired now... good night!
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| Right On Track. |
[22 Apr 2006|11:26pm] |
Tonight, tonight will be the night yeah tonight will be hell. And Im singing a song hoping you sing along sing along to your catchy song and... Im just happy your here. all feelings contained and thoughts possesed in this endless test and process of hope yeah hope ran dry and your pacing your thoughts and memory you lost somewhere out at sea when you swam home thattt day. and i dont remember being this cold and winters only days old and im just happy youll survive...
as your going off to sleep to stop thinking and dream
and its things like this that only end in goodbye and you sit around and ask yourself why hell, whats a goddamn beautiful night...
and you left with a common smile, brought by an endless while and furthur distances. and moving only makes it worse when your bound and strapped straight to the hearst of everything that ever seemed right. with your arms outstretched, so permanent. destroyed by whats so evident and real yeah wayyy toooo real. and hearts they only wait for this
the best thing since jesus and im just happy your alive.
as your getting up to leave just dropping everything.
and its things like this that always end in goodbye. and you sit around and wonder why hell what a goddamn ugggggggggllly nigghhhht
so breath in so deep, your losing breath yeah oh so quikly. alone in a sleepless town when noones around stars they work so hard, they make us seem weak, yeah they make up feel big yeah they make us kiss and sunsets mean the world to me even better when they tend to bleed colors so true and bold and yet they're so old and ollld hearted (you are) cold hearted (your are) lets get started' and get the hell away from here we're righhhhhhhhht on track.
i felt like typing...
i think i kinda like someone.?
Love Justin.
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| yesss. |
[22 Mar 2006|10:32am] |
Im the official Blood Pact Member of the Day.
I cant wait for the first.
<3
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| Wilco. |
[20 Mar 2006|11:38pm] |
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I am an American aquarium drinker I assassin down the avenue I'm hiding out in the big city blinking What was I thinking when I let go of you?
Let's forget about the tongue-tied lightning Let's undress just like cross-eyed strangers This is not a joke, so please stop smiling What was I thinking when I said it didn't hurt?
I want to glide through those brown eyes dreaming Take it from the inside, baby hold on tight You were so right when you said that I've been drinking What was I thinking when we said good night?
I want to hold you in the Bible-black predawn You're quite a quiet domino, bury me now Take off your Band-Aid because I don't believe in touchdowns What was I thinking when I said hello?
I'd always thought that if I held you tightly You'd always love me like you did back then Then I fell asleep and the city kept blinking What was I thinking when I let you back in?
I am trying to break your heart I am trying to break your heart But still I'd be lying if I said it wasn't easy I am trying to break your heart
Disposable Dixie-cup drinking I assassin down the avenue I'm hiding out in the big city blinking What was I thinking when I let go of you?
loves you I'm the man who loves you
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| omg. |
[20 Mar 2006|10:23am] |
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i need to find something to do.
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| EVERYday my will is tested but i cant decide to give in or divide. |
[18 Mar 2006|02:25pm] |
what is uppp.
so here i am.. away from rc like i wanted. my MYSELF (ryan left) and im bored out of my mind. I havent spend this much time on the internet in a loooong time. its sad. I got my license just yesterday and i had to drive through LA in the Dead Heat of traffic. it was sweet. we almost died only once, but at least it would have been in a brand new altima (those things are so fun to drive) ANYWAYS, so i went to the beach this morning with ryan. We went to this sweet New York Style pizza place right on the beach.. it was delicious and i plan on going back with my wife or something. then i went and got some european coffee (god, its so much better!) and i really want to travel right now. last night my grandmother, ryan, and myself went to this niiice burger place called islands and i had delicious chicken sandwich with teriyaki, grilled onions, swiss cheese, and pineapple. :) then ryan and Justin went to jamba juice and killed what was left of our stomachs. we went to barnes and noble and i got a new picture of the 100 best selling albums (i told grams not to buy it) what i really wanted was the rest of JD Salinger's books. he such a cool writer, well if the rest are anything like the catcher in the rye. i loved that book more than anything.
well after book shopping me and ryan came back and went on google maps because that is FUN. we saw: the white house, eiffel tower, vatican, great wall of china, burroughs, golden gate bridge, baghdad, tokyo, london, new york city, las vegas, bakersfield, my grandmothers house. everywhere. it was cool. you should try it.
anyways i need to find something to do in this town, i mean there is a bunch of stuff, but i cant really go anywhere by myself. well i could, but i would be lonely. but sometimes its good to be lonely, because you think. and i do that a lot. sometimes its good, sometimes it really sucks. depends on what your thinking about..
anyways. i need to find some love,
peace.
oh and ill probably be on here a lot, i have no one to talk to. :)
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| monday mornings. |
[06 Mar 2006|07:22am] |
i am totally not enjoying it. i couldnt sleep at ALL last night.. it was horrible. and now im sitting at school about to embark on another 13 hour day. school day...
anyways.. i had a decent weekend.. half/half. i hung out with kyle mike and kevan a lot of it and that was reallly awesome. we went to bakersfield all day saturday and it definitly the highlight..
yesterday all i did was sleep. watch tv. watched black hawk down. slept some more. BBQd. sleep. clean. read.
probably the best way to spend sundays EVER.
i had a good night last night, and it made me happy.
and i have all A's right now (hard work PAID OFF. what do you know?) but im slowly realizing that im slipping back into my old habit again.. where i procrastinate with my hw. NOT GOOD.
i still have straight A's though, and thats just badass.
25 days til alkaline trio.
damn, i am soooo excited.
did i mention they are playing with Against Me!
peace.
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| march. |
[01 Mar 2006|07:12am] |
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listless |
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music |
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my new smashing pumpkins ringtone. |
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"so terrible, the brilliance of her eyes....."
i love that small but amazing quote... i basically stole it from the iliad. its mind blowing how intense the writing was even 3000 years ago... i fully enjoy every part about the epic.
the quote has to do with the reason the trojan war was taking place.. some guy from one country stole a GIRL from another.. and ten years of the bloodiest battle known to man follows. crazy..
the greatness of the quote i think is could have like 32482342342 meanings and still be valid.. i basically think of when you meet someone, who you think is the most beautiful in the whole wide world, but yet some things just dont work out the way you wanted. and suffering takes place... not like being strangled (unless you want to put it like that) but the agony of not being able to find anything worth wanting, to you. because thet can not compare to your ideal woman/man. i wish things could be different with my brilliant eyed companion.. but sometimes things just dont work out like that. and i guess you just deal with it and try to find second best, and maybe someday they will be numbre ono.
ive been battling with this crap for a long time and its wierd. Im content, yet i wish i could be 110 percent. I dont need a girlfiend or anything right now.. i am probably the busiest i have ever been in my life.. but im still jealous. of her. of him. of all the happy couples everywhere. i like trying to make people happy... its what i LOVE to do.
i havent made a post like this in a long time.. but i cant stop thinking about it.. and im even DREAMING about it now.
i miss some important people in my life... and i feel pretty much alone.. with a few exceptions.
its really hard to deal with something that lasts as long as this has...
and i still shiver every time i get reminded of it... which is a damn lot. as random as it might be, somehow someway it shouts the name.
im pretty much crazy. and jealous. and now that i think about it i have extremily low self esteem when it comes to the matter.
hopefully things will be better in the days to come..
i have a feeling its going to be a little awkward.
well, time to go... to history.
bon voyage.
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| happy valentines day. |
[14 Feb 2006|11:20am] |
soooo whats up. im extremily bored in buisness graphics right now, because kyle sucks and ditched. and im by myself. but im listening to against me! and thats really cool. 45 days until the show. and its really exciting. soooooo... im still really busy... im doing so amazing in school right now.. better than i have in YEARS. I have all A's and B's. and i havent missed one assignment all quarter (its half over today). and yeah i rock. but its been hard work... i barely ever get any sleep, on the count im so late with homework, showers and such. besides all of that nonsense, its valentines day. and saying that gave a huge urge to listen to the honorary title. (amazing band).
february valentines day, did my best to avoid the red cliche'. so you dumped me on the subway, on the way to work at 9 in the morning.
i dont have a real valentine AGAIN. i havent in years. I really want to though.. i also wish to go to a dance with someone more than friends. that would be really cool. the dance on saturday was ok...... ummmm
and because i have been so busy i barely have had any time to work on any music. and its really sad.
anyways im going to go, the bell is going to ring in a few. peace out.
Love, J
many kisses and huge to you and your loved ones.
many kisses
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| all over the floor and your brown legs. the gold-plated legs of my rival. |
[02 Feb 2006|07:19am] |
whose eyes had no reason to fall.
so im excited because i finally got tickets to go see the trio on April 1st.
they are playing with againt me! and im very excited, i expect this to be the best trio show yet. The bands match almost perfectly and they are the only two.
im slowly but surely sharpening my againt me! word bank so it should be fun.
pretty much half of ridgecrest is going so its going to be crazy. besides that nothing much else is happening...
my cell phone should be here any day now and thats exciting. i finally got internet back yesterday. i should be getting my license sometime next week unless something goes terribly wrong.
the super bowl is coming up on sunday.. i dont really have a favored team, but im more of an underdog person so i might have to go with seattle. plus dcfc is from seattle and that alone is a good enough reason for them to win.
ive been sick all week and it really sucks. but im going to go now because i have to go to history.
oh and the dance is 9 days away. peace.
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| caring is creepy. |
[25 Jan 2006|07:23am] |
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amused |
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theshine/cursive |
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long time noooooooooooooo entry. im sorry. ive been so busy with school its insane. plus my computer at my house is handicapped right now. it wont even turn on without like, catching on fire. a few cool things are happening around my life.
im going to king of hearts with elisa preston. and its going to be badass. i got a new english class and its really cool. i enjoy it. i get my license in lets see...10 days. im soooo excited. alkaline trio on the first. saves the day on the 10th. thats in march though.
i think i want to be a river guide during the summer as a part time job. you know, like white water rafting... saving peoples lives and stuff. its kind of scary knowing those guys only need two days of training. HAHA.
ohhh man. ive been listening to way too much of this:
the shins- oh inverted world coldplay- parachutes cursive- the ugly organ alkaline trio- maybe ill catch fire wilco- live at vic theatre. johnny cash- greatest hits
along with some REM also. oh and THE BENJAMINS.
great stuff. anyways i think im going to go because everyone just left the room, and there might be a fire or something. peace.
oh and i lost my moms cell out in the desert, but some random old lady found it. so im pretty much safe
my life is just a string, and damnit one day someone is just going to cut it. i dont know why i said that. bye.
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| ashdkahda |
[10 Jan 2006|07:27am] |
I just got my picture taken for the school newspaper for being a "musician on campus" haha. i was doing something gayy. i really reallly really want to go fishing this weekend. Everyone is leaving and I have nothing to do. I could probably sit in my room the whole weekend but that gets old fast. And i cant believe im already talking about the weekend.. its tuesday. bell. I have to go take my final now. thanks michelle for the scarf! <3<3
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| weekend. |
[09 Jan 2006|07:23am] |
On friday night i went to tokyo house. ate some sushi. then we went into the caves, when i suddenly thought about the miners in west virginia. so i got the hell out. i went home.... sang some songs on some demos im making... then i went to sleep around 1 am because i was wayy tired.. on saturday i woke up and watched wildcard football all day. The Bucs lost which was kind of sad. some other team did also but i forgot who. ummmm. but yeah i worked on that song a little more and started to read my edgar allan poe book. fell asleep doing so.. sunday..... pretty much the same thing but then i remember i had a ton of homework including reading a whole book i barely had started. so i finished it finally and then finished my SONG i think. so overall it was a very productive yet unproductive weekend. i didnt see anybody because everyone likes to smoke pot and im just not down.
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| stuff. |
[09 Jan 2006|07:23am] |
1. name: 2. birthday: 3. place of residence: 4. what makes you happy: 5. what are you listening to now/have listened to last: 6. do you read my lj: 7. if you do, what is particularly good/bad about it: 8. an interesting fact about you: 9. are you in love/have a crush at the moment: 10. favorite place to be: 11. favorite lyric: 12. best time of the year:
RECOMMEND 1. a film: 2. a book: 3. a band, a song and an album:
PLUS 1. one thing you like about me: 2. two things you like about yourself: 3. put this in your lj so i can tell you what i think of you.
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| newwwwww year. |
[01 Jan 2006|11:13am] |
sugar ray was fuckin horrible... they were worse than i thought they would be.. if you can believe itttttttt
the good news is... i can tell my grandchildren i witnessed the legends in battle. ha.
rbf was amazing though, as were the violent femmes and Berlin.
I missed the psychedelic furs though damnit. i was mad.
although it was cool we got sweet backstage pass lanyards and got to go in all the cool places. peace out i need to go wake up kyle.
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| New years eve. |
[30 Dec 2005|04:00pm] |
I think all go to a totally 80's 90's pop concert.
REEL BIG FISH
Joan Jett, Sugar Ray, Violent Femmes,Psychadelic Furs, Berlin, English Beat, Bow Wow Wow, Lit
this is going to be fun.
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| advice |
[14 Dec 2005|07:11am] |
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music |
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some music the librarian is enjoying behind me. |
] |
do all your work when you first get it. wear gloves in the morning. wear two jackets everyday. sleep a lot. get a job before christmas time. be optimistic. get to work (im leaving now)
things ive learned over the last couple of weeks.
oh and if you want to at least place in BOTB, dont go ten minutes over your time.
lata
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| sooo |
[08 Dec 2005|10:56pm] |
life isnt that bad these days, besides working extra overtime on grades and stuff like that it isnt too bad. ive been spending a lot of time sleeping also haha. i think a lot of that has to do with getting up at 6 AM every morning. we played BOTB today and it wasnt bad. my hands are cold and it kind of sucks. but besides that. life isnt that bad these days.
i dont know what else to sayexcept i love you all.
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| do thiiiiiiis |
[03 Dec 2005|12:25pm] |
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mood |
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devious |
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music |
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SF-A3 |
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give me your name &;
1. I'll respond with something random about you. 2. I'll tell you what song/movie reminds me of you. 3. I'll pick a flavor of jello to wrestle you in. 4. I'll say something that only makes sense to you and me. 5. I'll tell you my first memory of you. 6. I'll tell you what animal you remind me of. 7. I'll ask you something I've always wondered about you. 8. If you do this you MUST post this on yours. You MUST. It is written
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| thing i stole from the coolest girl i barely ever talk to, and need to go to a show with again. |
[24 Nov 2005|11:54pm] |
1. My uncle once: headlined a show w/rxbandits. my other uncle became the ultimate bachelor
2. Never in my life: will i become a frat boy
3. The one person who can drive me nuts, but then can always manage to make me smile: Tyler.
4. High School was: annoying. boring. yet at the same time, i have to enjoy it.
6. My first real love: left town
7. If I were to get married right now my bridesmaids/groomsmen would be: ryan, becca, katie
8. I talk to my ex's: some all the time, some not so much
9. When I was 5: i wore oven mitts on my feet and thought i was a cowboy.. i also had a horse named ouchie.
10. Last Christmas I: had christmas at my grandmothers and then hung out with ty all night.
11. When I turn my head left, I see: school supplies, edvard munch's "the scream"
12. when i turn my head right, i see: a giant picture of a C 17 Globemaster, a printer.
13. The craziest Family Event was: My aunts wedding, or.. maybe tonight at thanksgiving.
14. If I was a character on Friends I'd be: A friend.
15. by this time next year: ill be 17, and it will have just turned midnight
16. My favorite Aunt is: ummm, cant decide... jean or beth.
17. I have a hard time understanding: religion, where things came from, the universe
18. One time at a family gathering: there was a giant ray at the edge of the water and drunken members of my uncles band started swimming with it.
19. You know I "like" you if: i call you a lot, spoil you with compliments, go out of my way to make you smile, tell you everything about me.
20. If you won an award, the first person/people youd thank: it depends on the award. ;)
21. Take my advice: listen to cursive.
22. My ideal breakfast is: honet bunches of oats.. with almonds and cold milk.
23. If you go to my hometown: bring a board game, DARE stickers, and head for the hills, they are much cooler than rc.
24. If you spend the night at my house: we will lock ourselves in my room and probably play music. and we will be bugged by children.
25. I'd stop my wedding if: someone had a heartattack, i got broken up with
26. The world could do without: papa roach
27. I'd rather lick the belly of a cockroach than: lick the belly of ten cockroaches
28. My favorite blonde is: when drew barrymore was blonde, my aunt beth, suzanne
29. Paper clips are more useful than: gum.
30. If I do anything well, it is: playing with kids.
31. And by the way: me and my sister are watching grease.
32. The last time I was high: 3 hours ago when i took toooo much of my inhaler
33. The animals I would like to see flying besides birds are: cats and dogs.... i guess.
34. I shouldn't be: awake, always sad
35. Once, at a bar: i bought matt skiba a drink.
36. Last night: i went don jose's and played with a song and went to bed early
37. There's this girl I know who: i love.
38. A better name for me would be: Jay
39. If I ever go back to school I'll: be happy.
40. Last time I went to church: i was being bad.
41. How many days until my birthday? like 10 moths.
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| listen well, will you marry me? |
[24 Nov 2005|11:41pm] |
haha. my title is from the new coheed and cambria video. not a bad song i guess. well i dont really liiiike it but the chorus is cool, and it was stuck in my head so thats why i wrote it. and because i want to marry you.
so i just got back from happy thanksgiving and uncle matt and aunt jeans house. they are such a cute married couple. they even have a cute little cat that kills my asthma. aw.
anyways.. i went over there at like one to help uncle matt cook... i cleaned and seasoned up a turkey.. and then we deep fried it. it was delicious. we actually had two turkeys... the other one had so many herbs and stuff on it, it was wonderful. i also fried a bunch of vegetables on the huge grill. it was fun. the food was deliciousssss.
after that we all had pie and coffee and talked for hours and hours. it was great. uncle matt is a wonderful chef.
anyways... i got a drumhead signed by everyone in reel big fish.. to make up for that show that i missed during the summer (where we got a flat tire on interstate 5) so that was nice of them :)
ummm.... my uncle and aunt gave me a painting they painted a while back.. and im also borrowing matts digital workstation (8tracks) til i get mine.. so im going to record a bunch of random stuff in my room.. its going to be awesome.
anyways i should probably get going to sleep soon.. we are leaving at like 7 AM.
its cold and foggy here.
and i had kind of a lame week.
blah. almost done with a new song though. whoo hoo.
happy thanksgiving darlin.
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| ajchkasjhdkahda |
[23 Nov 2005|10:53am] |
im bored at my grandmothers, in oc,
i need to go to sam ash and buy some guitar strings.
peace.
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| take me back to the city streets, take me out to the mountains to escape the heat |
[18 Nov 2005|07:12am] |
I woke up to a fire blazing in Ventura. it was sad.
anyways, i went to bed early again last night.. i guess thats a good thing. but the reason im going to bed so early is because i have nothing to do(no one to talk to) which i used to do everynight.
its ok though i guess. i get what i need to get done, done.. and i get a lot of extra sleep... its just wierd i guess.
I miss being really close to someone, where i know how they're day went everyday. Their thoughts and everything. Like we were around each other the whole time.
ah, im just jaded and jealous. really jaded and jealous.
and thats bad, really really bad.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet AGAIN. so i can stop writing songs about pretty much the same things.
i still looooooooooveeeeeee you. because love is love is love is love. i dont think love comes in different flavors.
i hope we still stay close... im starting to get kind of scared.
i hope everything is mutual. . . . .
i want to write some music i want to play a show i want to get up on stage and let it alllll go.
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| ive been sober for months for the sake of us. with my hands tied back.. now my visions blurred. |
[17 Nov 2005|07:23am] |
so im sitting here in the library, not looking forward to the next six hours so much. ive been working my ass off to get my grades up.. its starting to work i think.. im just paranoid about roberts class. ive been playing around with a cute little acoustic song for a few hours every night. I think its going to be pretty awesome. im pretty sure that it will just have to go on the EP when we get that going. anyways. ryans mad. tylers getting in trouble for playing games. its really cold outside and i like it. tyler and everyone else is getting a whole bunch of new clothes and im really needing lots of money for other things. tyler likes alexisonfire and i like giving him a hard time about that. everyone smokes pot. i cant wait to get the hell out of here next tuesday. im going to eat some food, hang out with my friends in orange county.. and hopefully record
bell rang
and all of the people, in all of their nations,
in their beautiful world with their beautiful faces.
will smile
cause they'll feel love.
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| as you were. |
[14 Nov 2005|07:25pm] |
so im sitting here...
listening to Augustana (thank god for chris)
and i dont know.
the show yesterday sucked... i didnt have fun at all..
so i went to sleep at like 6.
I feel really like.. poetic lately.
i have so much to say it seems like.. it almost feels like i dont have enough time.
or maybe patience to write it ALL down. and if i do.. if it will even be good enough.
and a wish.. that i have had for a while.. is to write a stupid happy song.
I really want to write an extremily happy song for someone. and then i want to sing it for them. face to face el solo.
everyone has so much awesome stuff going for them.. im kind jealous.
even though I am trying to look at the bright side. im bitter.
wow. jesus christ.
this song makes me sad. i was planning on writing more but i will some other time.
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| If I could somehow put all of this into some simple words, maybe ill write a hit. |
[14 Nov 2005|07:16pm] |
I must have been dreaming, I dreamnt that actor stole my words. That poet, yeah he had me all figured out I must of had said something something at all anything at all
and the air got so think we choked fighting temptations as our bodies provoked as the world turns, some emotions dont we try to kill time knowing we wont
were in a hell of an uphill battle waiting for some light we had our minds set on different destinations while we destroy the scene as you begin to drift, drift, drift
and the world got so cold we froze another excuse for you to remove your clothes as you, piss away the mood blaming anyone and everyone but you
were in a hell of an uphill battle waiting for some light we had our minds set on different destinations while we destroy the scene as you begin to drift, drift, drift
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| cough cough. |
[10 Nov 2005|07:15am] |
Hello journal..
im at school right now. im sick. i hate it.
I decided i shouldnt miss anymore days so i came even though I cant breath.
I spent four hours doing history homework last night, and it sucked. I miss someone quite a bit right now. I think im jealous or something..
we have a show on sunday and I am super excited.. I dont really expect it to be anything special, considering its in like an alley.
but nonetheless, im going to dance.
The real comeback is going to take place at battle of the bands.
im pretty sure we are going to do ok this year.
anyways i need to give my lungs a workout.
(asthma sucks)
have a nice thursday!
<3 Justin Jason Decker
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